The good, the bad and the bitching!

Leaving my old work was very sad. There are some great people there and for all my complaining, those people are what kept me there for so long.

My going away party was held at a local pub where we were all able to order chicken parma. A bunch of people made speeches, my boss, editor, the assistant art director and my good friend and partner in crime. It was touching to know that I had meant a lot to so many and that these friendships will continue on. In fact, 3 weeks since leaving I have had a few facebook messages from everyone there.

Also a testament to them, my going away pressie was more than I ever could have expected! Flowers and something small was all I expected and all we usually do for people… but instead they kept handing out present after present.

A HUGE bunch of flowers that one of the boys organised (apparently he was really stressed out because he wanted to be sure I would love the flowers! Crazy boy!)

A bottle of perfume

A bottle of pomegranate vodka (mmm)

And a little blue bag from Tiffanys! It contained:

And is my first piece from that brand, very exciting. I now wear it everywhere and whenever this new work gets stressful I can look at it and know that I am a good worker and I will eventually fit in here.

Thanks to all my former co workers!

My dad first started making potato casserole for us back in the early 90s when there was a microwave craze going on. Mum had just started working longer hours and Dad had taken up the cooking duties. Microwave cookery was an easy way to learn and Dad embraced it.

It is a very unhealthy recipe, but it just reminds me of all those home cooked meals from my dad (who moved on from microwave cookery to become a brilliant cook!) and I like to make it every few weeks because Ben is now a little obsessed with it.

I now like to add in sweet potato to my version, but for the traditional version

INGREDIENTS

3 potatoes, sliced

1 sweet potato, sliced

1 tablespoon butter

Half cup grated cheese

Half onion, diced

METHOD

Put all the ingredients in a microwave safe container, mix together. Put in microwave for 10 minutes. Once done, take out, check with fork to see if ready. If still not cooked through, cook in microwave for 2 minutes extra each time, until done. This is important as over cooking causes the cheese to burn.

I served this with vegies and parmesan crusted chicken.

To make the parmesan crusted chicken:

Put strips of chicken in flour, then egg, then roll in a mixture of breadcrumbs and parmesan.

It aint healthy, but it is carbelicious!

Starting a new job is a tough, emotional, stressful and all round horrible time. Even on the good days it still isn’t right.

I am having a tough time adjusting to the new job. This first week has shown me a few things that I perhaps didn’t think about:

The main one being that I didn’t realise was the school wasn’t just private, its Anglican. This may be a silly thing to not realise, but it is mentioned nowhere and while I figured it would be based on a Christian religion, I figured it might not be a big part of the school. A friend of mine went to an equally prestigious school that was Anglican that had no religious studies or church services.

This school is heavily religious. They have a chaplain and each assembly they sing hymns and say prayers and at least once a term they have church service and next week, being easter I have to attend TWO masses.

It might not seem like a big deal for some, but for me this is a massive moral conflict. I went to a catholic school all throughout my school years and by age 12 I just knew religion wasn’t for me. It wasn’t until 16 though that I started speaking up. And since then I have had a massive sense of relief. I have felt more free to be myself and happy in my belief in me. I don’t need a god, I don’t need religion and I certainly believe in peoples rights to choose their own belief.

Where I get angry is when people do not respect my belief. And now that I am in this position I am slightly worried, I feel like I cannot be myself and I do not know why. Nobody has asked my religious beliefs, or even discussed religion around me but I feel a little like an imposter. I do not hold those religious beliefs and I do not want to have my own beliefs questioned. I do not want to be judged on my lack of religious beliefs and have people think that it means I cannot do my job. I may be insecure here, I am sure not everyone holds those beliefs, but I am new and I don’t want anything ruining this job.

The other thing I didn’t think of was how many extra curricular activities are run at a school, and how many Saturdays and evenings I may be asked to give up. I could easily lose one evening or a Saturday each week and that would just be attending the events I need to attend. I have always been the kind of person who loves my job and really gets into it, but I have drawn a line so that my work life balance is sorted. I don’t want to spend weekends working, or else you just become a person with no life.

I don’t know how I feel about the job yet. Some days I think it will be good, others I wonder why I took it. Thursday night was particularly bad. Ben is away and I had a bad day at work. I was left to do my own thing for the majority of the day when I don’t have my own thing to do yet. I was stressed out because all I could think to do to pass the time was read my google reader and gmails, and that caused me stress because maybe it will get me into trouble. I don’t know. But, what else can I do when there are 4 hours and nothing to do.

So after work I went to the gym, came home and ate dinner, and all around stressed. I was emotional on my way home, practically crying at a radio programs story on bushfire victims calling family to tell them they were going to die and describing that feeling and it made me just so sad. By the time Ben called me I was tearing up and he was really worried because he was so far away and couldn’t do anything. But there was nothing he could say… I had just had a bad day, I was regretting my decisions, and worried for my future and I was freaking out.

I shed some tears and watched some tv, and went to bed and slept rather soundly. Today was better than yesterday but still… the next few weeks are going to be tough. I apologise now for any additional levels of bitching.

When I stress, I tend to run straight into the comforting arms of chocolate. Chocolate anything… it doesnt have to be one certain kind, any will do, as long as it satiates the cravings that I have.

With starting this new job I am noticing this craving even more than ever. And my usual way of getting past the chocolate need is to drink a milo… the malt flavour is close enough to chocolate and it gets rid of that need. Except, the milo just aint cutting it anymore. It just doesnt have the chocolate taste I need. It is cold out, and despite that, all I want in the world is a cold rock icecream. More specifically, cookies and cream ice cream with cookie dough mixed in and covered with hot fudge sauce. THAT would stop my craving.

Last night, cleaning off the table, I picked up the bag of M&Ms that Ben had a few days ago to put it in the bin when I heard a clanging of remaining M&Ms rubbing together. And that was awesome. I ate the 5 leftover M&Ms and felt my body calm down and relax. Amazing the effect that chocolate can have. I dont know if its the diet and the fact that all things chocolate related have been banned as much as possible, but when times get tough it is the only thing that will do. To the point where I have craved it so much that Ben has offered to go out and get me some. But, I wouldnt let him. Because that would make me a crazy fat lady. I am seriously considering getting me a chocolate bar on the way home tonight.

Sometimes in life, things just don’t go your way. Everything these days seems to be a little like that.

Like organising an Etag (an electronic toll pass) so I can drive to my new job… I got declined due to a supposed debt under my name, when I have never had one before. Turns out there is someone with the same living on my street that had that debt.

Then my phone died. No biggie, its insured, just take it to the store but when I got there, the guy at the store started trying to screw me over. Saying it was going to cost $170 to repair it or for just $220 he can get me out of my contract and get me a new phone. When I said to him that there was no way I could afford that and why on earth had I been paying $7 a month for insurance? He said he hears me but sometimes the insurance company charges. I told him I was not told there would be a cost and my understanding was that it was free, he said it very well might be but why risk it when I could get a much cooler phone for just $220. I told him in the nicest way to screw himself and went home to call the phone company. The phone company said that guy was pulling bullshit and that I should go into a different store.

So I did, and easy as that I got a new phone. Only the phone wouldn’t turn on so I took it back and in between transferring from my old phone to this new one my sim had died. So I freaked out about the need for my numbers and somehow the guy fixed it but still… very annoying.

But the latest straw happened just 10 minutes ago. Grays Anatomy is on, ben is out, and I had bought myself a yummy ice cream when I went to get petrol earlier as a way of relaxing and rewarding myself for some hard work at the gym this week. As I was opening the icecream I saw that it had “win one of 10,000 mp3 players frozen inside” and I thought to myself, ohhh it had better not be.

But of course, it was. As I am unwrapping it I see a plastic cone and I am getting mad. No ice cream, and of course you have to log on to their website to get the mp3 player and you don’t get an mp3 player and an icecream, you get an icecream OR the mp3 player.

I was so looking forward to the icecream… and now, I am faced with a massive craving for the chocolate and I have no icecream, I am in my PJs and I don’t want to miss grays. Plus I also don’t want to look like a crazy chocolate lady by returning an mp3 player for an icecream.

But why is this bothering me so much? Every little thing I seem to do lately has a touch of bad luck to it… and im worried about starting my new job. Last night I dreamt that I had a cold on my first day at work and woke up so freaked and even now whenever I sniff I get a little worried. Because being sick on your first day is a bad sign, like the job isn’t for you. And I am so scared ive made a mistake, or that I am no good at anything outside of my comfort zone and I know it is totally stupid to think this way but I just cant help it.

Now, I am off to make myself a chocolatey milkshake to try and get rid of the chocolate craving. Tomorrow I may have to visit the cupcake store.

I have been hanging out with my sister a little bit lately… a few drunken nights with some old friends and it is times like these that you realies just how different we can be.

She is 3 years younger and not nearly as responsible as me… she still lives off mum and dad a fair bit, despite living out of home and her career goals are to avoid full time work.

So we are sitting there, having a chat with one of my friends from NY who was in town and things turned to talks of childhood and she tries to make out like how independent she is because “she remembers making all her own vegemite sandwiches from the time she was 7 and how she never ate her lunch because it was just so bad.” Because you know, mum was a working woman and she just didn’t do those things for us. Uhh what? I grew up in the same house hold and I only started making my lunch in year 7 so I could avoid taking an apple with me! If she ever made her own lunch it was probably because she wanted to.

Sure, mum worked a lot. But it wasn’t until we were well into our years at primary school, and when mum started working longer hours, my dad switched his hours so that he could pick us up from school and make our dinner, help us with homework.

We don’t have a traditional household, dad is a little more like the mum but it works for us. But she never wanted for anything and she certainly never missed mum – mum was still home by 6.30 at night at the latest!

What bothers me is she is going around telling people what a “hard” childhood she had because mum works. What absolute crap! Mum is a working woman due to necessity for our family to eat! When it became clear that mum was going to make more money, they rearranged their roles. And its not a big deal.

She surrounds herself with a lot of ‘artistic’ types – ones that play up their hard lives and let every man and their dog know they were abused or had a drug problem or eating disorder or whatever their deal is. And I feel bad for these people… they are her friends and they are nice people but I think my sister feels as if her normal childhood is boring, so any little disadvantage she has perceived she is going to play up.

But my parents look after her so well… so well that I wish they would cut her off and let her grow up! She wants hardship, learn to survive on what she actually earns, let her stop drinking 5 nights a week and actually save for food. Fuck, I did, why cant she?

So apart from telling her that she was totally exaggerating and mum didn’t even work long hours until she was at least 9, I let her know that her attitude stinks! Mum is a really successful business woman and so respected for what she does and she did that for our futures not for her own gain. And if my sister wants to sit there and take her money every week, she can stop bitching to anyone who will listen what a hard life she has had. Because seriously? If you are 23 and your mum still funds your lifestyle, you’ve got no cause to complain.

Sausage and bean pasta salad from taste.com.au

Ingredients (serves 4)
300g dried orecchiette pasta (see note)
4 (70g each) Italian pork sausages
1/4 cup olive oil
2 garlic cloves, thinly sliced
500g cherry tomatoes, halved
400g can cannellini beans, drained, rinsed
50g baby spinach leaves
1/2 cup fresh basil leaves
crusty bread, to serve
Method
Cook pasta in a large saucepan of boiling salted water, following packet directions, until tender. Drain.
Meanwhile, heat a large non-stick frying pan over medium-high heat until hot. Cook sausages for 3 minutes each side or until cooked through. Remove from pan. Slice.
Heat 1 tablespoon of oil in pan. Add garlic and tomatoes. Cook, stirring occasionally, for 5 minutes or until tomatoes are just tender.
Place remaining oil, pasta, sausage, beans, spinach and basil in a large bowl. Add tomato mixture and toss gently to combine. Serve with crusty bread.

This was a great, light dinner. It satisfies the boys love of sausage (HAA!) and my need to appear like im eating healthily.

This has to be one of the yummiest risottos EVER! I think it must be the flavour of the pesto or something? I dont know… but whenever we have it, it all gets eaten. Very naughty.

http://www.taste.com.au/recipes/7475/mallorys+chicken+pumpkin+and+pesto+risotto

Ingredients (serves 4)
1/3 cup olive oil
1kg butternut pumpkin, peeled, cut into 2cm cubes
1/4 cup water
2 large chicken breast fillets, trimmed
1 onion, finely chopped
2 garlic cloves, crushed
2 cups arborio rice
4 cups chicken stock
1/3 cup basil pesto
Method
Heat 1 tablespoon of oil in a frying pan over medium-high heat. Add pumpkin. Cook, tossing, for 5 minutes, or until golden. Add water. Cook for a further 5 to 8 minutes, or until just tender. Drain. Transfer to a plate and keep warm.
Heat 1 tablespoon of oil in the frying pan over medium-high heat. Add chicken. Cook for 5 minutes each side, or until just cooked through. Remove to a plate and cover to keep warm.
Heat remaining oil in a large saucepan over medium heat. Add onion and garlic. Cook for 3 minutes, or until onion is soft. Stir in rice. Cook for 1 minute. Add stock. Bring to the boil. Cover with a tight-fitting lid. Reduce heat to low. Cook for 20 minutes, stirring occasionally.
Thinly slice chicken. Stir into rice mixture with pumpkin. Cover. Cook for a further 5 minutes. Season with pepper. Spoon into bowls. Top with pesto. Serve.

I also added in some capsicum this time for extra veggie power.

This is the year I get our place decorated… you know, just in time so that we can move out!

I have had the material for AGES for these pillows… like August? But there was a big saga involving my sewing machine, and long story short: we no longer lend it to my sister!

So the before picture:

BORING! (and messy)

And the after:

I am a masterful sewer. or not… they arent perfect but they are colourful! And Ben really likes them. We were sitting there a few days after they were made and he was like “I really like these pillows. theyre cool” and that is as much approval you can get from boys on decorating!

Next up: possibly my bedside tables!

I really love these:

So Im scouring Ebay and considering cheap bedside tables from IKEA that I will paint in a nice bright turqoiuse colour, which will add much needed colour to our plain white walls and our black and white themed room.

I was just catching up on one of the blogs I read and saw this post on Ramblings of a green yogurt and it hit me like a bit of a wave.

She mentioned a blog friend of hers wife had just died from leukemia… Dave from Five String Guitar which is so sad and my heart goes out to them.

Last week one of our staff members – an older lady who had recently given up smoking – began saying she was having trouble getting out of bed and was so tired… she wasnt sick really, but just so tired. We thought she had given herself a flu from the shock of quitting smoking. But, as she got sicker she booked a doctors appointment, but couldnt get in until Thursday. Wednesday evening came and she felt so sick that she begged the doctor to see her early. She was there, they decided to do some blood tests and the second they drew blood, down she went.

They rushed her to hospital and she has remained there since. They didnt know what was wrong with her last week, but we returned from our long weekend on Tuesday to be told that she has leukemia and was starting chemo that day. It was definately a sobering moment to think of this fiesty lady having to go through something so horrible.

There are few words to explain how awesome this lady is. From Day 1 she had me sold! We poached her from the industry and her reputation as a hard ass had preceeded her. I met her at an annual truck show, marched right up to her and introduced myself, welcomed her to the company, had a quick chat then we both got on with our work. Later in the day she met some of the other staff and straight away told my boss how much she hated one of the girls, a girl that I particularly disliked! Oh and she loved me! For her to straight away pick out who was good at their job and who wasnt is a great skill and she is so blunt with the truth that it often comes out as offensive if you are on the other end.

Another time, she was sitting at a desk, just watching our receptionist at the time do absolutely nothing. I walked past, and asked her if she was OK, and she just spat out a tirade “She is just sitting there, ignoring the phone! The damn phone is ringing and she wont pick it up! Why wont she pick it up! Im going to take that damn mobile off her and tell her to do her damn job!” Now it may sound harsh, but its totally true! THe receptionist refused to answer our phones, and our boss was protecting her because he felt bad for her. One word from BB though, and the receptionist had her ass kicked.

Apparently theyve caught it early and they are hopeful they can cure her… its just such a shock for someone so full of life to be struck down that quickly. We are all thinking of her, and hoping she pulls through. I might be leaving here, but when shes well enough my friend and I hope to visit her (she lives interstate).